"This indicates that these people were family oriented and
held women in high esteem." he says. "The donkey shows they
were smart enough to use animals to till the soil. The
shovel means they were able to forge tools. Even further
proof of high intelligence is the fish: If famine hit the
earth, they would take to the sea for food. The last symbol
is the Star of David, telling us they were Hebrews."

The second archeologist shakes his head. "Hebrew is read
from right to left," he explains. "It says, 'Holy Mackerel,
Dig the Ass on that Chick!'"

"Hello, sir," she said, "Do you like movies?"

"Yes, I do," he responded, then returned to his book.

Goldie persisted. "Do you like gardening?"

The man again looked up from his book. "Yes, I do," he said
politely before returning to his reading.

Undaunted, Goldie asked, "Do you like pussycats?"

With that, the man dropped his book and pounced on Goldie,
ravaging her as she'd never been ravaged before.

As the cloud of sand began to settle, Goldie dragged herself
to a sitting position and panted, "How did you know that was
what I wanted?"

The man thought for a moment and replied, "How did you know
my name was Katz?

After the husband's examination, the doctor then said to the

elderly man, "You appear to be in good health. Do you have
any medical concerns that you would like to ask me?"

"In fact, I do," said the old man. "After I have sex with
my wife the first time, I am usually hot and sweaty, and
then, after I have sex with my wife the second time, I'm
usually cold and chilly." The doctor said that he would
examine the wife, and then report back to the man.

After examining the elderly lady, the doctor said:
"Everything appears to be fine. Do you have any medical
concerns that you would like to discuss with me?"

The lady replied that she had no questions or concerns.

The doctor then asked: "Your husband had an unusual concern.
He claims that he is usually hot and sweaty after having sex
the first time with you, and then cold and chilly after the
second time. Do you know why?"

"Oh that crazy old nut", she replied. "That's because the
first time is usually in July and the second time is usually
in December!"

First programmer says, "Hey, where'd you get that great
mountain bike?"

Second programmer says, "It was free."

First programmer says, "How'd you get it free?"

Second programmer says, "The other day I came to this park
to eat and this really beautiful woman rode up. She jumped
off the bike, took all her clothes off, and said, 'You can
have anything you want!'"

First programmer says, "You were right to take the bike. I
bet none of her clothes would've fit you."